TAR chapter 56 - perfect

-Horatio-

“Rat we absolutely can’t have sex, I mean you just woke up and as much as I’d like this, I don’t want to accidentally hurt you or put more pressure on your body,” Xabien reasons. It turns out that playing card games with stripping thrown in the mix is very entertaining.

I mean, Xabien was so bad that he was practically naked instantly and I really felt for him, he gets cold easily plus he was embarrassed, but he was determined to get me naked too. In the end, I deliberately lost a few games just so he would have that satisfaction of thinking he won.

Bless him, I don’t think he ever figured out that I was deliberately losing.

Still, Xabien’s point about not putting more pressure on my body does make sense, even if I only feel a little weaker than usual. And then a smirk creeps onto my face and settles down there as I glance up at Xabien.

Shifting slightly forwards so that I’m right in front of my mate, I say “you remember that conversation we had a while ago? Well, I have an idea which means you wouldn’t be putting more pressure on my body.”

—————

“Are you sure you’re ok with this?” I ask him again, just to make sure. I’ve mentioned it to Xabien a few times, but we’ve always just had sex with me bottoming. Well. Until now, that is. Xabien strokes my cheek, kissing me gently.

“I’m more than ok with it, sweetheart. I want to try this. I promise I’ll tell you if I hate it,” he says softly, and I bite his lip, grinding my hips against his. I believe him, because when I brought this up before, he was pretty open to trying it out sometime, and I can’t help but feel that us both being horny and me having just woken up from a four-day coma helped to persuade him somewhat.

Xabien’s hands hold my hips strongly as he pushes his hips in to mine, sucking on my neck as I moan into his ear at the friction.

I know exactly what gets him going when I want him to fuck me, so working out what’ll get him in the mood to be the one to get fucked is going to be an interesting challenge, one which I hope I’ll have multiple chances to perfect.

All the more reason to make sure he enjoys himself; he’s always the one doing all the work whilst I’m just a moaning mess beneath him, but this time- this time, I’ll make him unable to talk through his moans as I pleasure him.

We end up with me pushed back up against the headboard whilst Xabien sits in my lap- yes, even that’s new. Normally, I’m the one straddling him. He has to bend down a little to kiss me, because whilst on top of my lap he’s massively taller than me, but oh well. There’s something really sexy about having him tower over me, and I’m pretty sure that won’t change, regardless of who’s on the bottom.

I cup his ass, and I know this is a totally new experience for him, but the little gasp he makes is fun as I spread his ass, pushing a finger in gently. “Are you ok, Xabi?” I ask, pecking his lips slowly.

He nods, stroking my cheek fondly. “Yes, sweetheart. Are you?” I smile, pressing my lips to his as I feel him beam into the kiss also.

At some point, Xabien’s body realises that he’s the one going to get fucked, and he starts producing those lovely liquids that I do, and he seems extremely surprised when I point this out to him.

“Oh my God, I didn’t think I- wow. That’s kind of cool,” he says with a little laugh, before going back to sucking at my neck. He deliberately only attacks the left side of my neck with his lips, knowing that I won’t be able to feel a lot of what he’s doing on the right side, because of all the scar tissue.

I slide a second finger inside him, scissoring them and watching Xabien’s expression for any signs of pleasure or pain. His slight discomfort quickly shifts to pleasure as I thrust my fingers as deeply as they’ll go, searching around for something I know will make him enjoy himself.

When I find it, my mate moans loudly in my ear, and I kiss his neck gently. “Now you know why I get rather loud,” I whisper as I continue thrusting my digits into him. Xabien leans forwards, resting his head on my shoulder and sucking at my collarbone as I add another finger.

He’s never had anything shoved up his ass before, and even though two fingers would probably have loosened him up enough, I want to make sure he’ll be ok when I actually fuck him, rather than taking a risk and hurting him.

I never want to hurt Xabien.

I just want to make him happy, make him feel pleasure, convey to him my feelings. I never want to make him sad, or hurt him. I’m sure I will at some point - I’ll do something stupid and offend him, or accidentally whack him in my sleep or something. But, I’ll do my best to treasure him, the same way I know he will treasure me back.

Removing all my fingers from him, I kiss the side of Xabien’s mouth. “Condom or no condom?” I ask, and he thinks about it for a moment, before kissing me deeply, his tongue gliding across mine as he rubs himself up against me. We’re both extremely hard, which is good to know.

“No condom. Can you pick the position though? I want whichever will hurt the least,” he says with a small smile, and I nod. “Probably from the back then. I love seeing your face, but because I won’t be able to, you’ll have to let me hear your voice instead,” I whisper into his ear, nipping at his earlobe.

He shudders slightly, and I wrap my arms around him, remembering that he gets cold easily. We move around until he’s on his hands and knees whilst I position myself behind him. His silky liquids are still trickling out of his hole, and I swipe a finger up his thigh, collecting some on my finger and rubbing it across my erection.

Then, I do as he always does, and press a finger down on the rim of his hole, letting some more of his erotic wetness dribble out, before lubricating my cock with that also. “Alright Xabi, let me know immediately if it really hurts, ok? Or if you want to stop, or anything,” I say gently, and he glances back at me, his face slightly pink but his smile wide.

“I’ll tell you, sweetheart,” he says softly, and I smile, leaning forwards to peck his lips once more. Resting my knees on the bed, I slowly caress his ass, before grabbing his cheeks and spreading them gently, watching his hole twitch slightly as I push my tip up against him.

Sliding the head in, I wait for Xabien to tell me it’s alright, before I push the rest of the way in. He’s completely silent for a moment, before he chuckles. Rubbing circles into his thighs, I raise an eyebrow at him as he turns his head to look at me.

“Your dick is the first I’ve ever seen which isn’t mine, obviously, and I guess I never realised this, but…you’re actually kind of big, aren’t you?”

I laugh, leaning forwards to kiss him again. “I’m perfectly average I think, but I’ll take that as a compliment,” I say, kissing the mating mark I left on his shoulder.

A few moments after, I begin moving. I keep the pace slow and gentle the entire time but deep as I aim each thrust directly into the bundle of nerves within his channels, making every movement I do elicit a moan from my mate.

“Fuck, Rat sweetie, I want to see you,” Xabien gasps, right before he comes. His walls tighten around me, and I thrust in a few more times before kissing him as I come inside him. We stay like that for a moment, both panting into the kiss until I lean back, pulling out. We kept it slow and steady, so I’m not exhausted like I normally am when Xabien’s the one on top, but he does seem pretty tired. Plus, I don’t want to go overboard and accidentally make myself sick after my whacky healing recently, but I feel pretty great so far.

“Are you ok?” I ask gently, stroking his cheek. “Yeah, that was- I liked it,” he says shyly, and I try and bite back my smile at his embarrassed little blush. “Yeah? I’m glad. I liked it too,” I whisper, pecking his lips.

Xabien stares at me for a moment, before slowly pushing me off him, so that he can move. I expect him to go get in the shower or something, but instead he lies down on his back. “Can we do it again, and this time in this position, so I can see you?” He asks quietly, refusing to meet my eyes whilst his face goes extremely red.

I laugh, bending down and kissing him, letting my hand trail up and down his chest, stroking across his abs and toying with his nipples as I reach each of them respectively.

“Of course. From experience, this position is generally a little more painful for me, but we can keep things slow still,” I say gently, and Xabien looks at me fondly. “I have a newfound respect for you bottoming, it’s harder than I thought,” he says with a laugh, and I smile, stroking his cheek. “Each role has its own challenges, I think.”

He nods sagely, before trailing his fingers down my chest, tracing along my scars until he reaches my hips, where he rubs across the tip of my already-stiffening cock.

“Looks like you might need a little help before we do it again,” he says with a smirk as he wraps his hand around me. “Oh yeah? The same could be said about you,” I reply, letting a finger glide up his shaft.

“God, now I have the dilemma of looking at you and thinking that I want to get fucked by you but also thinking how much I want to fuck you,” I say with a laugh until I see Xabien’s honest expression.

“I was literally going to say the same thing,” he laughs, and I lean over him, unable to stop myself from kissing his soft lips and stroking his jaw gently. “Well, we did say we were going to make this mistake a thousand times, if I remember correctly,” I whisper into his mouth as he laughs.

“I couldn’t ask for anything more perfect,” he says back, his hand smoothing up and down my back as I capture his lips with mine once again.